There’s all kinds of different women out there – some will never step foot in the woods, while others will boldly hunt by themselves (kudos to them!). Then there are the tweeners who are neither the former nor the latter. This article is for them – a kind reminder of a few things to keep in mind while hunting with your man (reverse the roles if your man is the one joining you;).
Disclaimer: All of the following were learned the hard way – in person, during actual hunts…
1 – Dress warmer than warm
It seems like every woman I know has poor circulation. This is not a good attribute for long and motionless sits in the stand, so wear some good gear and layer up! If you’re not a fan of the cold, then enjoy a few sits during the early season when it’s nice and comfortable.
2 – Pee, then pee again
Women, by nature, were “blessed” with smaller bladders than most men so be sure to empty it before the hunt. It’s easy for a man to pee out of a tree, but for a woman . . . not so much.
3 – Don’t expect a cozy or comfortable sit
In most cases, you’ll be sitting on a cheap, one inch piece of foam the treestand manufacturer sent along to cover a couple of steel bars so they can deem it as a “comfortable” seat. If you’re lucky (in this case), maybe your man spends more on his treestands than he does on you. If that happens, you’ll finally be able to understand why he spent the extra money for a nice comfy seat or heated blind.
4 – It’s not “cute”
When you’re sitting in the woods, you’ll see more natural beauty than you ever knew existed. While it’s beautiful, it is not cute. So when that deer comes walking by don’t turn to say “it’s so cute”… this is not a scene from Bambi… that’s our dinner.
5 – Turn that phone off or leave it in the truck
Connect with nature, not you’re BFF. Enjoy a sliver of silence for once and leave that handheld computer in the truck. After all, we wouldn’t want your fingers getting cold, would we??
6 – Don’t yell “RUN!”
Ahhh, the life of growing up with sisters . . . we’d be sitting at the dinner table when all of a sudden I’d see a squirrel or rabbit enjoying a nice nut or meal in our backyard. I’d slip into the basement, grab the pellet gun and sneak around the house. Right before I could settle the crosshairs I’d here the porch door open and followed by a “Run Squirrel!!!!” DON’T DO THIS!
7 – Don’t ask, “How much longer?”
It’s simple, we sit until dark. If it happens to be a morning sit, this question will only invoke a longer sit.
8 – Don’t start a lengthy convo
We don’t mind answering a few questions about things relevant to the hunt, but please stay away from topics regarding so-and-so’s relationship, work problems, home remodeling plans, weekend plans, or any other topic that can wait. Enjoy the tranquility.
9 – Comfort > Cuteness
If you’re coming hunting with us, chances are we already like you A LOT so there is no need to dress cute for us. And since you won’t have your cell phone, there’s no need to look good for your treestand selfie either. Much too often, cute is chosen over comfort and warmth…this is becomes a big problem when you’re out in the elements.
10 – Did you hear that?
You may hear some crazy stuff in the woods – in darkness or daylight. Keep calm and don’t freak out. While there are plenty of eerie sounds out in the wild, it likely isn’t coming for you. And if it is, I apologize for the bad advice and hopefully you have a “one shot, one kill” kind of man…